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The Ketchup of the Far Right

A friend showed me this link, www.wketchup.com

IT's a ketchup which attempts to stir the political fervour of Conservative Americans. But let's look deeper.

The leading competitor not only has 57 varieties, but has 57 foreign factories as well. W Ketchup comes in one flavor: American." This surprised me, as I grew up near the main Heinz plant in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and the number (which I'm fairly sure is spurious - it's awfully convenient that a company with the slogan "57 varieties" would just happen to have exactly 57 factories outside America, and transport costs make food products generally be manufactured fairly near where they're sold. A quick visit to the Heinz website and my confusion disappeared: It redirected me to information oabout its UK operation. Of course! If they're selling internationally, it makes no sense for them to pay expensive transport costs to ship, for instance, heavy glass bottles over the Atlantic ocean (and may not be worth it to ship the tomatoes either.) How very misleading your facts are, O W Ketchup!

I'm also fairly sure some of their facts are outright lies. For instance, they claim to have been on ABC’s Good Morning America, but here's their synopsis: "In an on-air taste test between W Ketchup and Heinz, W Ketchup was judged as tasting “more conservative, with a sweeter, more compassionate taste.”" - I'm not sure it's entirely legal to try to pass off misleading information by claiming it's a joke, Dubya Ketchup. It makes one wonder how much else of what they wrote is made up or misleading.

*THEN* I looked at the charity these profits go to:
The Freedom Alliance Scholarship Fund Firstly, the link to their application form doesn't work - the PDF is corrupted, so one wonders how many applications are being processed. It's run by Oliver North, the fellow who, for my generation, is synonymous with the Iran-Contra scandal, the primary person responsible for selling weapons to Iran to pay for the funding of terrorists contras. Rather makes his sententious articles about the War on Terror hypocritical, but, never mind. More importantly, know that every bottle of ketchup you buy supports a known perjurer, probable embezzler, and provider of arms to US-funded terrorists.

And, lastly, just for fun, a couple of quotes from two randomly selected articles:

"And therein lies the greater part of the solution to protecting sensitive information in this new world disorder. Forget prosecuting publishers. Don’t bother pursuing phoneys like Hersh. Insist that those who have access to classified information abide by the non-disclosure agreements they have signed. Use polygraph tests to randomly check on compliance – just like we check for drugs. When government employees break the law, indict them. And as for the rest of us, just don’t buy trash like the Al Qaeda Reader.
-Leaks vs. Liberty

What a nice bit of fascist thought. Criticise the whistle-blowers, and institute draconian testing regimes on anyone who ever signed a non-disclosure agreement. Not that lie detector tests are all that accurate, of course.

"It is ironic that they would harbor such anti-U.S. and pro-UN sentiments. The U.S. rescued the French from German tyranny in WW I and II, and protected them from the Soviet Union during the Cold War. It is largely because of U.S. efforts and American goodwill, that Germany was able to overcome its Nazi past and confrontation with communism by evolving into a free self-governing unified country. And one mustn’t forget there are still 150,000 U.S. troops deployed in Europe to protect those countries from foreign attack."
-European Ingrates

I've always felt this arguement particularly unconvincing: "Sixty years ago we joined with British troops to help liberate Europe. We'll now ignore the British side of the struggle, and say you're now never allowed to disagree with anything we say or do again."

...Ah, well. Such is Olviver North


This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on February 5, 2005 12:18 AM.

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