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[Adam Cuerden] Groningen bij Dag

Well, I'm back from my holiday, and really should do the rest of that 75% finished Baraminology post. It even has nevw illustrative material. But first, the visit to co-bloggers Reinder, Jeroen, and Secret Guest Co-Blogger who May or May Not post.

It was a fun, if somewhat subdued trip, due to me recovering from a rather long illness. Got quite a lot of Dutch comics at the Stripmuseum, got enough liquorice to be sick of it for a while, practiced drawing and finally finished some old art and generally had fun with friends.

But the reason for this weekend in particular was to make fun of Eurovision, so, let's begin. I type up my notes as taken on the day, without much commentary. It's much more fun that way.

Bosnia and Herzegovenia: Very poor visuals, but a good, well-written Eastern European folksong. The lead singer was wearing a dress like a cabbage, surrounded by women staying perfectly still in odd poses and some idiotic-looking fellow with some folk-guitar - probably a balalika - serenaded her.

Spain Endlessly repetitive, but energeticly agressive song. Four posers in white suits dancing quite well, but over-choreographed. Terrible background.

Belarus At first, I thought this might be alright, then they started singing.Nice visuals, good effects with people seeing to become attached to walls.

(This was followed by a transition featuring a particularly ugly man wearing almost nothing diving into a hot spring.)

Ireland It was something like a stereotypical Irish song sung by a woman who was... either panicked or on drugs. I suspect there will be more blogging on this entry over the next few days.

Finland Elvira, Mistress of the Dark returns! And sings a not half-bad song. Sounded like something Cher would sing. Not crap, not great.

Macedonia Pure crap.

(This was followed by a transition which involved making an ice sculpture, then setting it on fire. What the hell?)

Slovenia Gothic music meets Eastern European folk music with a snappy disco beat. It... kind of works.

Hungary A pretty good blues song by a person with a good voice and a pleasant girl-next-door appearance. Probably the best so far by a long ways. One of the few I'd happily listen to again, though, admittedly, listening to it again as I type it up, it's still pretty good, but not as good as I remembered it. Singer's great though.

Lithuania Pretty average song, of the sort you'd find in a modern musical like Chess or as a background to a movie. Boring, but not ear-bleeding.

Greece Music to film porn to. If the lead singer's involved, gay porn.

Georgia Not bad, whatr's with the caucasian men dressed as Japanese warriors dancing with swords?
Sweden Crossdressing man singing a retro song out of the 70's. Catchy, but music to line dance to.

France Flaming homosexuals do country and western. Badly.

Latvia Very... old-fashioned song, in Italian. That will not end, Augh!!!!! [Last four words underlined repeatedly]

Russia Five strong, agressive women's group singing a 1980's / 90's song with a strong, rocking beat. [I didn't write much on this one, probably because it was the best of the songs, and so I was distracted actually listening to it]

Germany 1940's cabaret, very well done.

Serbia Butch girl dressed as a man surrounded by beautiful women. Awfully like a bad Cher song, but far better sung.

Ukraine Bad transvestite. No further information too drunk from keychange dinking game. Keyc hanges every few seconds. At least 12. [This one's very poorly written. I was pretty drunk by then]

U.K. Stewardesses [spelt Stueurdesses - I was drunk] and stewards with inuendo by "Are You Being Served". That's about it. Done in the most awful, boriing manner, but while looking for the video, I found this version which is... far, far better, if still very silly. I suppose humour really is all in the performance, and the Eurovision performance... sucked mightily..

Romania: What the fuck? This cheesy song about love is like a children's program's theme song. Lots of key changes.

Bulgaria ...the Hell?

Turkey To quote what I wrote at the time: "I'm oo drunk to comment on this... thing. See 'Ukraine'." I'm too scared to watch it again to find out what I meant.

Armenia See Reinder's comments. At the time, I was only able to write "Can't stop laughing. What the hell?" I did laugh the entire time it was on, and could not stop. Sadly,. it still has that effect on me.

Moldova For some reason, I never wrote anything on this at the time. Watching a bit of it, I think my brain may be trying to block the memory. Nice use of classical modes, though. Pity they forgot about giving the singer a melody.


Conclusions: Russia by far the best. Hungary and Germany pretty good, a few others are alright. Several total clunkers. Don't know why Serbia won. Maybe people really like Cher and girls that look like fat 16 year old boys.

Comments (4)

Thanks! My comments will go up tonight, including a roundup of reactions from Irish bloggers in particular.

Branko Collin:

Haven't watched the show, but watched some of the clips you linked to, and I think Finland should have won.

Branko Collin:

Argh! I meant the entire show (contest) should have won, not the entry.

Branko Collin:

I should probably drink more. I figured that after my last two comments I might as well watch the Finnish entry, and thought it wasn't bad at all.

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